Never Fall in Love with Your History Teacher
by Alison224
Summary: Rating subject to change. The title doesn't really reflect on the story. Giles has to find a replacement for Buffy's history teacher. What happens when Buffy starts to have feelings for her sub??
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own the characters from Buffy, Joss Whedon does (lucky devil). Anyway, I'm just "borrowing" them for a bit. The plot and disclaimer are MINE, MINE, MINE! lol. As it has been called to my attention several times, I seem to skip in between seasons and move things around. If that really bothers you, I'm sorry, it's my fic and I like the way it is. I hope you like this fic as much as I do (which is quite a bit). Anyway, reviews are always welcome ttyl :)  
~Sprite~  
  
Never Fall in Love With Your History Teacher; Especially If He's a Vamp  
  
Again dedicated to my loving Cousine. I'm glad you'e still into Buffy, itÕs a cool thing to be into :) I love you and enjoy this story. (Again more laughs for patheticness lol :)  
Mr. Roderbaker, the world history teacher for Sunnydale High, lay awake in a large hospital bed in the emergency room of the Sunnydale Hospital. After being attacked by what he could only describe as a gang member on PCP, he decided he'd had enough. After not taking any sick days in 15 years, he had asked for a vacation. Three weeks paid vacation as a matter of fact. He had already called Principal Snyder and told him his plans. He couldn't say that the principal was happy, in fact, Snyder was down right pissed. The principal kept asking where he was going to get another world history teacher for a bunch of high school kids for three weeks. Mr. Roderbaker told him to shove it up his... and that it wasn't his problem, before hanging up the phone curtly. As the peacefulness of the hospital room set in, Mr. Roderbaker pulled out his new travel brochures and started to peruse them.  
  
~The Same Day at the library at Sunnydale High~  
  
"I don't care how you do it, just do it!" Principal Snyder shouted at poor Rupert Giles.  
  
"Well, uh, Sir, it'll be a bit hard to find a history teacher on such short notice. Especially for a bunch of high school kids. Perhaps you could teach them a bit and meanwhile I could be looking for some one qualified enough to teach?" Rupert Giles, the librarian, suggested meekly to the already red Principal Snyder.  
  
"Me teach them?! Me teach them?! Giles that is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard! I don't care if you have to teach the dumb snots, just get some one! And they had better be here tomorrow bright and early!" Snyder screeched at the liberian.  
  
"But Sir,"  
  
"No buts Giles, or your paycheck will hear about it. Got it?!" Snyder yelled as he exited the library as fast as he had come, leaving a puzzled Giles standing there thinking about his new predicament.  
  
~Mr. Roderbaker's world history class, same day~  
  
"Hey guys, guess what?" Xander Harris whispered to his two best friends. Without waiting for them to answer, he continued."I heard Roderbaker's ditched us. Got so sick of teaching he just up and left!"  
  
Buffy Summers, his best friend looked at him incredulously.   
  
"Right, Xand. And I suppose the mummies from outer space are back again right?" Willow, Buffy and Xander's other best friend laughed quietly.  
  
"It's true Xander," Willow stated, "Roderbaker hasn't taken a day off in 15 years."  
  
"I swear it's true guys. You don't have to believe me, but Cordy told me..." It was at that moment that he was cut off by the door opening sharply, as a sneaky looking figure entered the room.   
  
"Class," he said snidely "you know I don't think you deserve this, but I'm at my wits end, and I want to go home. As many of you know, Mr. Roderbaker, that prick," he whispered under his breath, "has taken a three week vacation and won't be back for a while, maybe even never at all. So, I have decided since I don't want to spend fifty minutes with you filth rags, you may all have a study hall this period. Now that means no talking, no notes, and definitely no leaving campus early. You will all wait until the bell rings to depart. Is that clear?" he asked a group of Goths sitting in the corner with their head phones on over their ears, as much as to the rest of the class. Principal Snyder didn't wait for a reply before heading out the door.   
  
"Told ya," was all Xander Harris had to say to his friends, who still sat gaping at the door with their mouths hanging open. All the students in the class had already packed up their bags and were heading for the door.   
  
"Wow, I guess even on the Hellmouth good things happen sometimes." Buffy said to herself, grabbing her bag and running to catch up to her friends.  
  
~2 Hours later in the library~  
  
"Yes, well thank you anyway Steven. No, it's quite all right I understand. Changing your mother back from a Pomeranian should take a higher priority. Yes, now goodbye. Well, this has been just a great day," Giles said to himself quietly after he hung up the phone.  
  
"Yes, it has G -Man. Roderbaker's gone and we have three weeks of study halls and no history!" Xander Harris shouted as he waltzed into the library doing a strange dance he seemed to be making up as he went along.   
  
"Xander, how many times have I asked you not to call me G -Man?" Giles said quietly while rubbing his tired eyes.   
  
"Too many to count," Xander said smartly.  
  
"So, Giles, what's up?" Buffy asked the older man.  
  
"What's up Buffy, is that I have to find a replacement for your history teacher, or I loose my job." Giles said in an exasperated tone.  
  
"Relax Giles," Willow said in her soft voice, pushing her shoulder length red hair out of the way. "I'm sure it's not as bad as you're making it out to be."  
  
"I would say that, except I've called all the people on the Watcher's Council that I know plus any one else. I even went as low as to ask that dreadful Calendar woman if she would do it. No one will do it. My day has turned into a living nightmare."   
  
"Okay, maybe it could be as bad as you thought," the red head said slightly.  
  
"G-Man, I know, why don't you just do it. You're old, you're history, you'd be perfect." Xander said grinning.  
  
"I would teach Xander, except I have to keep constantly researching new threats in Sunnydale. I can't afford to have any one come snooping around the library when I'm not here. Buffy, would you mind terribly if I canceled training for tonight to look for a replacement?"  
  
"Oh, Giles, I'd be devastated," the petite blond said sarcastically. "I think I'll still know how to handle a few vamps, if I miss one day of training."  
  
"Thank you Buffy. Don't worry I'll make it up to you. One of these days we'll go double and work all day."  
  
"Giles, you're not serious!" Buffy gasped.  
  
"Of course not. Now have fun patrolling and going to the Bronze. Don't stay up too late." The older Englishman told her affectionately. After all these years, he had become more than just her watcher, he had become a father to her.  
  
Giles went through a few more phone books until he came across a familiar name. It was his last hope even though with all his heart he didn't want to call. Unfortunately, he was down to his wits end. He slowly dialed the number and listened to the chiming of the death tolls.  
  
Dun, dun, dun... lol TBC If people want more. I have this story almost completely finished, so I hope that's incentive to review lol. I hope you like it ttyl :)  
~Sprite~ 


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own the characters from Buffy, Joss Whedon does (lucky devil). Anyway, I'm just "borrowing" them for a bit. The plot and disclaimer are MINE, MINE, MINE! lol. As it has been called to my attention several times, I seem to skip in between seasons and move things around. If that really bothers you, I'm sorry, it's my fic and I like the way it is. I hope you like this fic as much as I do (which is quite a bit). Anyway, reviews are always welcome ttyl :) Smile, ~Liz~  
  
DEDICATION: Reviewer 131 Thank you soo much for your review! You're right, you did read it on BS Central. I'm glad you decided to review even though you know what's going to happen, it really means a lot to me. I hope you continue to read, review, and enjoy. Thanks again for reviewing!!! ttyl :)  
  
Leanne8582: Thanks lol I tried to give it a bit of a cliffhanger ending, so people will keep reading. I hope you enjoy this chapter!  
  
ollie: lol the rest is coming! I just want to make sure the readers still like it.   
  
Jenn: Yes, you did read it on BS Central. I hope you enjoy it just as much though!!!! I'll keep updating as long as I keep getting reviews so... lol keep reading!!! Thanks.  
  
spikette55: Well, I can't tell you if it's Spike or not...lol OF COURSE IT IS!!!! Anyway, I try to capture his character (all the snarky, wordly, sarcasmness of his), but I'm not sure I got it totally right, you'll have to tell me how I did. I hope you keep reading and reviewing!! Lol don't worry Buffy will do some of the things he says...Enjoy!! Thanks for your review ttyl :)  
  
~Chapter 2~  
  
" 'ello?" A tired, but familiar English voice answered into the phone.  
  
"Spike, it's Giles."  
  
"Well, 'ello G-Man," Spike said using Xander's favorite pet name for the older man. "It's been a while since I last heard from you, thankfully. What's up? Slayer's not in trouble is she? Not that I care 'f course." Spike asked as he tensed up in his chair, waking up immediately.  
  
"No, Buffy's fine. Spike I know this is going to sound crazy, but I'm desperate."  
  
"As usual," Spike muttered under his breath. "Shoot G-Man," Spike said into the phone, leaning back into his leather chair.  
  
"Well, Mr. Roderbaker, the history teacher here, has gone and left on a three week vacation with out getting a substitute or anything, and I'm stuck here, my job on the line, looking for some one to fill the position. I know this is a long shot, I don't like you, and you don't like me, but I really need your help. Would you teach his European History class?"  
  
"Sure Ducks."  
  
"Please, what, oh, thank God. Thank you so much."  
  
"One question," Spike asked, "what's in it for me?"  
  
"For you, well, I... I hadn't really thought about it. What would you like?"  
  
"Well, for starters, time alone with the slayer, I love to fight with her, you know?" Spike licked his lips as the prospect of sparring with her entered his mind. "Say, an hour a day in the library, and I get to patrol with her every night for say, ha'f a year?"  
  
"Absolutely not, Buffy would hate me for all eternity."  
  
"All right then, I'm hanging up Tweed. You can kiss your substitute and your job goodbye."  
  
"Wait, Spike, all right. You can have ten minutes in the library with her,"  
  
"Ha'f hour at least."  
  
"Fine, a half hour after school, and you can patrol with her twice for one week."  
  
"No deal, now three nights a week for two weeks, and you've got yourself a sub. Take it or leave it."  
  
"Fine, you bloody leach, three nights a week for two weeks. You had better be here at 9:00 a.m. tomorrow morning, I don't care if the sun is out or not. You are invited to the school."  
  
"Understood Ducks, see you bright and early. Pleasant dreams," Spike joked as he hung up the phone.  
  
*Oh no, what have I done?* The watcher asked himself silently as he hung up the phone. He had just invited a vampire to the school, as well as promised one of his mortal, well, immortal enemies time with his young slayer. She would surely hate him forever. Especially since she had just started to get over Angel. Now, a "new" vamp would be thrust back into her life.  
  
Spike had decided he would leave later that night so he could be at the school in the morning. He smiled to himself as he thought of the prospect of spending some good quality time with his favorite blond slayer. Maybe he would even get over his stupid pansy feelings and kill her; after a good sparring match of course.  
  
~The next morning about 8:00 a.m. in the Sunnydale High library~  
  
Giles slowly walked into the library after having a terrible night's sleep. He still wasn't sure if he was going to regret asking Spike to help him, but it was already too late. No one else would take the job. As he walked into his office, he nearly screamed with surprise and dropped his books, seeing Spike sitting in his favorite chair.  
  
"Mornin', Tweed," Spike told him as he shifted in the chair.  
  
"What are you doing here at this time?" Giles asked him, heart still pounding.  
  
"You said to be here bright and early, so I came last night and spent the night."  
  
"I see," Giles said taking off his glasses to clean them as he always did when he was nervous and needed something to occupy his hands.  
  
"Well, I suppose I should show you around the school so you know where you're going."  
  
"Sounds like a plan Tweed." Spike said grinning.  
  
"Would you please refrain from calling me that." Giles asked anxiously.  
  
"Calling you what Tweed?" Spike teased mercilessly smirking lightly.  
  
"So, here we have the cafeteria, and gymnasium. By the way I forgot to mention you will also need to be the gym teacher twice a week."  
  
"That was never discussed in the original deal." Spike replied frowning.  
  
"I'm sorry I just found out this morning."  
  
"You do know this will cost extra?" Spike asked the watcher, as he nonchalantly examined his black nail polish, chipped into circles, just the way he liked it.  
  
"No need, Buffy is in the gym class."  
  
"I think you know me too well Watcher." The delectable Brit told the older looking man, smiling.  
  
"For all our sakes, I certainly hope so." The watcher whispered under his breath. Spike heard him, with his super sensitive hearing, but just grinned.  
  
"Anyway to continue on, this is the art room, and we're back at the library, and now I'll show you your class room." The two Englishmen continued downstairs until they reached a rather large room in the basement of the school. "Lucky for you, his room is down here where there are no windows."  
  
"Yeah, it is." Spike said as his mind drifted. He was already busy gazing into the room, that the watcher was standing in.  
  
"Over here, are the test papers, and the computer, and here under the desks are the text books. Why aren't you coming in?" The watcher asked curiously before he cursed himself and remembered that the vampire had to be invited. "Oh, excuse me, I nearly I forgot. You may come in Spike." The watcher said, embarrassed.  
  
"Thanks Tweed, might be helpful for me to be able to come in if I'm going to teach." Spike said sarcastically.  
  
"Oh my," Giles said, looking at his watch, "it's getting late and the students should be here any minute. Your classes are from 10:00 a.m. to 10:50 a.m. and from 1:30 p.m. to 2:20 p.m. in between those times, you are free to do what ever you wish. I never thought I'd be saying this, but thank you Spike."  
  
"No prob. Tweed. Any time you need help, just ask the whipped pansy." Spike said under his breath. He really was whipped, and over a slayer no less. He kept trying to tell himself that it was just physical and he just wanted to shag, no, kill the beautiful blond. There were no feelings except hate attached with her. Lucky for him his first class came in before he could finish analyzing his strange feelings and emotions. Spike ran his fingers through his peroxide spikes and grinned. His class settled down according to the seating chart, to add to his good fortune, they were a bunch of smart juniors and seniors who listened to him and helped him out with his notes for the day. The class went without a hitch and before he knew it, time was up and his class departed. He had mainly gone over his rules and asked a few questions about the class and the pupils. After his class left, he went about exploring the school in a bit more detail, being extremely careful to watch out for the sunlight streaming in many of the windows into the hallway. By the time he got back the the room, his students were already there and there was a snaky looking man standing there waiting for him.  
  
"You had better not be the substitute for Mr. Roderbaker." The snake hissed at him.  
  
"Sorry to disappoint you Ducks, but I'm uh, Mr. uh, Wilson, Mr. Giles' nephew. He was desperate and down to the wire so he asked me to do it. I just got my teaching degree so I am qualified." Spike lied. *Well it wasn't a total lie,* he thought, he did have the knowledge to teach the class.  
  
"Alright Mr. Wilson, I don't care about your credentials or what you do in your spare time as long as you somewhat teach those horrible snot rags something. From now on, you're on your own." Snyder leered at him before he turned and walked into the instantly silent history room. "As promised," Snyder said, "here is your substitute for history. You had better listen to him or you'll all fail, understood?" Snyder proclaimed venomously. The students gulped and slid back into their desks, nodding softly. "Here is your sub, his name is Mr. uh, Wilson, and he is Mr. Giles, the librarian's, nephew." Snyder said before stepping aside to let Spike walk into the room. The female half of the room gasped along with Xander who slipped out of his chair with shock. Willow almost followed him, but managed to calm herself in time. The entire class laughed at Xander, including Spike.  
  
"Problem Ducks?" Spike grinned, asking in his North London accent.  
  
"What are you doing here?" Xander asked, voice full of contempt.  
  
"Were you listening to a word the snake said?" Spike asked once Snyder left. "I'm here to teach you miserable Ducks a thing or two about history. Got a problem Mouth Boy?" Xander shook his head still in shock. "Further more, if you so much as question my authority, I'll fail you, plain an' simple." Spike said grinning evilly.  
  
"Oh, I'm so sorry I'm late but I have a pass from Mr. Giles, the librarian..." A petite blond assured Spike as she rushed into the history room. She cut herself off as she looked up to see who her new substitute would be, and promptly fainted. Fortunately, Spike was standing right there and managed to catch her before she fell. He was almost as surprised as she was, but tried not to show it.  
  
TBC!!!! It was nice and long!! I hope you liked it. What's gonna happen next chapter? I guess you'll just have to review to find out. Muahaha!!!!!! lol Enjoy!! ttyl :)  
  
~Liz~ 


End file.
